I’ll suffice it to this; I feel my luck has run out. My foolish reckless abandonment now has consequences, the trial period is over. I have pushed my limits far enough, it’s time I learn and head on back. I have always wanted to go there and back, have a story, have an adventure, but not at the cost of what I could lose. I’m still interesting. I’m still learning.

I’ve been writing a lot, on a typewriter actually. It’s interesting when you just bleed onto the paper with no filter. Therapeutic really. I’m just not sure if any of it is actually good. I might have a few friends read it and give me some feedback before I start posting short stories and poetry here. I’m ascared….

Some good job prospects! Great things coming for Lavish Laines winery! They just bought a new location off Buena Vista and Tesla in Livermore (right next to all the other wineries) so that will be amazing, we are going to open up a tasting room there as well. AND they want me to be their webmaster and get paid. Woot. I just need o find time to get down to Livermore to work on the harvest and get the new winery ready. OH AND I’m getting a couple more babysitting jobs coming in from the bay. All my jobs want me to be in the bay… interesting… Too bad things are starting to conflict with comedy sportz and some other obligations though.

I have had a lot of visitors recently, its nice. Last weekend Colleen came and stayed from Humboldt and Sean came and stayed from Elk Grove. So fun! We had birthday fun early. This weekend Ruth will be here! and there will be more shenanigans. Then next weekend my good old buddy Tim Muldoon will be staying with me for a couple days! He is applying to UC Davis Med School! Love when friends visit me.

Words and Voices went great!!! I got great compliments and it made me feel kinda validated. It really felt like creating art and bringing something to life more than traditional theatre has felt recently. One of the pieces I worked on was called “Jack & Coke” a poem about drunk driving beginning with the wake of the lives after the crash and working its way backwards to the celebration that brought on the accident. It was good for me to do. Between that, generally not driving anymore, and payments that are horrendous. I think I have effectively learned a lesson. I don’t want to hide problems like this, I wear them. In fact, there are TWO articles in my school newspaper coming out this Tuesday featuring me. And in one it will mention my DUI and how I prepared for my play. I have some anxiety about it being printed, but I need it to be so I can move on. The other article is about Cafe Noir, the open mic night I host. And there’s gonna be a picture of me there’s something extremely unfufilling about being in my community college newspaper. Twice. After I have been there for over 4 years. #signIneedtoleave

The good news is that Slaughterhouse-5 has just started rehearsal, and it promises to be ridiculous and very challenging. THANK GOD. It has given me a distinct interest in World War II lately, and I don’t have any interest in wars typically.  I usually don’t even like war movies. But then I found out today talking to my grandma that her father died at age 43 in 1945 in the war. That is right when our play will be set and it made me realize that this is my grandmothers generation. And it is real. I guess I just feel a bit more connected now. So ready to get this shit started!

Birthday month starts today! Still keeping it pretty low key. Just going out and drinking with some friends this weekend. I love my birthday but I need to take it easy and not glorify myself right now, its better for my health. I know it’s bad when I literally am planning a redemption speech to my family at my birthday dinner, I have to shape up. For me and for them. And they need to know that its important and I’m not blowing them off.

Honestly, the reason I have been writing so much lately is because I hope this lifestyle will give me a retirement package in that it should make a good book someday. That’s my ego speaking hoping what I’m doing means something. Hoping that I am important and more than a party kid looking for an escape. I’m still holding out hope, hence I write.

**the picture on top is from Greg Dorado’s going away party, I’m gonna miss him!

peace

Court did not go my way, and I owe a lot of money…. A LOT OF MONEY. Full story about this whole ordeal soon. Its really quite funny an educational cautionary tale.

But… moving on, good news! Got cast in slaughterhouse 5! Feel good now that I held out for this show. Great right? well…

Here’s the thing, (and yeah I’m gonna bitch for a minute, so if you’re not interested yall can leave devinritchie.com. Directly). I studied for this play so hard. I read the play like 4 times, broke it down, read into characters, I even read the fuckin novel for this show. And I don’t read books. I need to prepare like this for every audition because I apparently don’t have the natural panache others have to just walk in to any audition and get cast on mere talent. But I got cast so what am I bitching about? Well, I’m playing a smaller role than I had hoped for. That’s fine. I really don’t mind doing ensemble roles, especially in a show like this. If you are familiar with Slaughterhouse, I am playing the British soldier named Reggie. The guy who puts on a production of Cinderella for the other soldiers, and stars as Cinderella. …That’s right. Somehow in a play about time travel, war, and the DRESDEN BOMBING I got cast as the ONE man who wears a dress. Yes ladies and gentlemen, the only fag in the play is in drag. I’m a fucking walking talking gay joke. I’m nearly offended. I’m just tired of this gay joke thing. It will be funny and I will do it well. But, ugh. This sort of thing has been happening to me a lot. Its not acting, its a fucking perpetuation of a stereotype. Most my friends got the roles they wanted, bad ass army guys who fight, or characters with real

depth. I’m the fag in the dress. Moreover, the person who got a role I wanted and literally cues my entrance, and has a more pivotal part than I, is the same person who missed his god damn entrance in Philadelphia Story (my last play), leaving me to have to improvise and cover for him. I was a fish out of god damn water in front of an audience. Twice. Yes TWICE. we only performed it seven times. Why we rehearse for 2 months to not even bother going on stage is beyond me. But I guess that’s how to prove yourself as a dedicated actor. So I feel a bit slapped in the face being a gay joke, and being cast under someone who has done this to me on stage. That is my rant. And now its over.

Let’s put 2 and 2 together… I am no longer excited about this play due to casting and the fact that there is 20 people in it. AND I need money BAD. Do I drop the play? For my own sake and sanity and so I can be an adult paying off my fines. Or should I go gay it up and play dress up?

New Subject.

I’m headed to the bay in the morning. Kyle is having me take a train out there and were going to the Scottish Games in Pleasanton tomorrow, and the wine festival in Livermore on Sunday. Good. I need some space and clarity. And thank god Ruth is home tonight, I’m going out for the first time in a while. I have been taking it easy recently. But now its time to go celebrate my Scottish roots and wine taste. Watch pipers and get food from Clan McKintosh. Cant wait.

I dunno what to do I’m all lost and confused yall.

peace.

To begin, a great deal of my close friends moved away. I knew it was coming but it has really hit me when I sit at home alone and wonder what I used to do. Ruth lives in Chico, Colleen and Adie live in Humboldt, Victoria Louisville, My friend big black gay Corey moved to Laramie, Wyoming.  Even people like Mike Holcombe have moved to LA. After Matt Marr’s house burnt down he has been traveling and he is now sure he will move to L.A. Needless to say, my social life has taken a hit. I stay in a lot more evenings by myself reading, writing, or watching various marathons of House, Law and Order SVU, or something. I have just been lonely I guess.

My Mom’s car is gold sebring convertible, the symbol of summer, and the car I learned how to drive on. There have been so many times where Ruth, John Farns, and I are hung over and we roll out of bed and drive with the top down to theriver. And drink some 4 Locos. My brother needed a car so we decided to give that one to him. Now my mom and I share the Scion, she needs it more of course having a real job and all… back to the bike for me. :-/

It seems lately that love has been in the air (cheesy yes, but hear me out). So many of my friends are involved with someone and so happy. Max and Amanda, John Farns, Kelsey, Ruth, etc etc. Momentarily I was kinda seeing someone and happy, and for just a moment it seemed everyone was happy. But then of course I found out that I had simply got swept up in ideas of being in a relationship and misinterpreted some things and ended up putting myself in a situation that allowed me to get hurt by others actions. Whatevs, I’m done. I’m single and unattached completely. Time gave me clarity to realize I was being stupid, and I really don’t care. I AM happy for all my friends, I am happy being single Devin, and I am a better person for not dating people who are bad for me. But I do always seem to be the odd man out in these situations. It wears on me a bit.

The cherry on top of my delightful banana shit sundae of a situation I have been in… The one job I have babysitting at a church every Sunday That I have had for 4 years. Such an easy job that I LOVE that is easy money in my pocket….. Well, they laid me off on Sunday. Not because of me at all, they can just not afford child care at all anymore. I have one more

Sunday and that’s it. FUCK. My one source of income. Fuck. My. Life. This is effective September 1st. Why does that day sound familiar? Oh, cause its the day of my court date. (Yes, I have a court date. I got into a little trouble. Hopefully it will be nothing, but it might be. I will disclose the full story after its all said and done. Nothing crazy don’t worry)

My brother looked at my situation like this “so you’re basically back to where you started when you moved to Sacramento, no car, no job, no relationship, few friends” Somehow that is oddly comforting. Something of a new beginning happening right now. Life has dealt me some rotten ass lemons right now, and I am powering through but its hard. I can deal with the no job, no car, no money thing. But it just really sucks that everything has been taken away at the same time. The time I need friends. Who aren’t here.

At the moment, I am not attending school. I would probably set myself back further if I went. I need a job(and I have been applying!)

Right now I am living day at a time with very short term achievable goals. apply for jobs, work out everyday, drink less, and get cast in a play next week. So far so good. I do work out everyday I have a new gym membership and I have been going hard. If nothing else in life I will look good without my shirt on.

I chose the cute apocalypse gif at the top because its really cute and the general complete change of everything in my life recently, and because of Mike Wise’s Post Apocalypse Party he had. Which was awesome. Pictures at the bottom. There is always a lot of parties, this last weekend was Mady Wrights 36 hour birthday party which was fun and…. eventful.

This is a reminder to the world and myself that I am fucking awesome. I do good things and have fun. There are great

people in my life, and I know now more than ever who they are. I have come upon some rough times recently and ya know what? It might get worse, it could always. But I have dealt with way more problems in my life than some little bull shit like this. I’m a baller with some of the best friends, and the BEST family anyone could ask for. Don’t give me your pity, today ain’t nothing but a hair flip. It might be just like this for a long time, but there is peace and some success at the end of this trail. It shouldn’t be easy and its not. Never has been. I have been blessed in many ways that I am quietly thankful for and find myself to sometimes be the luckiest person alive. Lately has just been a string of losses that have warn me down, I have to admit I am down and move on though. I’m not blaming fate or the world for my problems, many of them are direct results of my actions and I know that. I’m down but I’m not out. I’m ready for new shit and prepared to take on whatever I need to. Oh yeah, and I’m hot.

I leave you with another new Eminem song, featuring Pink (whom I fuckin love)

WONT. BACK. DOWN.

Peace.

Bettin on the ponys with Jenny!

Casey Worthington had his “Not 4th of July Party”, it’s exactly what you think it is. It was real fun, but one of those times when being drunk during the day gets away from you… On a similar note; I have had anger and patience issues recently. It is well documented that Ritchies can have a bit of a temper problem, and they may be catching up with me. I just need to chill more. I’m sure the hotel concierge and the “deck supervisor” at the pool at my gym aren’t really as stupid as they seem, and even if they are, no sense in being mean to them. Oh yeah! I joined a gym! Sexy DURING summer. hell yeah, I have been working out like everyday ^_^

John Farnsworth’s parents were out of town this week so I hung out there a lot this week. It’s good to just have a place where friends can gather like that with no agenda. We go to the river. We drink. We swim at someones pool. We smoke. We hang out. We go out. I live a very relaxed life. I should not have the stress to lash out at fat gingers who are apparently just paid to sit by a pool and tell people not to run and not help people if they are in need. also he has blonde eyebrows. wierd. people who don’t deserve it.

I have been doing a lot of odd jobs making money, and it keeps me afloat more than usual. but its not enough to save or contribute quite enough. Still job hunting.

Yesterday was another friends going away party, the 3rd in the last week. Times are changing and people are moving. and still a few more are moving including Ruth. But I have known that people were going to leave me. What hurt, was hearing that Michael Sunshine and his girlfriend Ella up and moved from Davis to Seattle. I found this out when I texted him about partying. Michael is one of my core friends from Livermore and we don’t see each other too often, but I have always liked having him so close just in case. I have always had the feeling that everyone else is growing up and I’m not. Most my friends from high school have real good jobs and are in serious relationships. It’s that moment in life when you realize there are a bunch of grown ups at your party. And that’s what they have become. I have always felt belittled by living my type of life. I don’t judge them, and really I’m not even mad. The reality is I feel like I lost a cornerstone of my building. In other words, shit just got real.

To add to this dejected feeling, I went and hung out with Tim and Maggie Muldoon who’s older brother got married in Davis last weekend. The epitome of growing up. Naturally we try to see each other as much as we can. So they invite me to all the pre-wedding shenanigans and parties and such. Problem is, I’m not invited to the wedding and just end up being kinda embarrassed being there at all. “That’s just Maggie and Tim’s friend who is here to party”. That’s reall not who I want to be. I left. Again I understand it, and am not mad. This is just the situation I am living. People are growing up and they need to, but they still like me to be their party vacation from life. Honestly it’s shit like this that motivates me more than anything.

moral of the story: Not seeing Peter Pan makes you want to grow up.

Oh yeah, and I’m BLONDE now

peace

If I can get a job, my plan starts gong into effect. My plan is more of an outline, and I don’t want to divulge the details of it right now in fear of not being certain of it yet. I’m getting there though.

I am literally scared for when Ruth, Colleen, Corey, Adie, Victoria, and others all leave for college in a couple months. I have already felt less welcome with my own friends recently and what happens when I lose a good portion of my core? Maybe I will focus more on my goals. Or maybe I will get more depressed.

In reality everything is looking up though, job opportunities, no school stressing me out, I’m in a great show, haven’t been drinking too much, and minimal drama. Odd how those last two things are connected.

I have been having so many dreams recently. I have been thinking a lot about time travel, other dimensions, and after life. The series finale of LOST got me thinking and I watched Donnie Darko yesterday. I have not wanted to talk about it in fears of sounding crazy, but whatevs. I’m fuckin crazy and yall can stop reading devinritchie.com if its a problem. Maybe its because I have eaten some curious thought provoking foods in my time but I honestly believe my dreams have been a window into my personal enlightenment, and I feel like I get it. I don’t fleet my time away working for the man living in a cubicle so I can eat hamburger helper and sleep in one bedroom apartment over a laundromat. Its not my path, I’m too knowledgeable to let that happen. When my friend Andy hoover died two years ago. I became glad that he didn’t waste his life working. He spent every moment living how ever he wanted and dressing how ever he wanted. Kind of inspired me. Showed me how fleeting life is and who the fuck cares? I don’t know what the point of writing this is, because this isnt something that can be told to you. Everyone has to come up with this on their own. Ok, fuck I sound way crazy… I swear I’m not high at all.

I’m going out to Second Saturday tonight in Midtown Sacto, this break from everything has been fantastic for me.

Yes, that is a picture of me, Ruth, and a cock.

peace