The only difference was the night before thanksgiving, my brother, sister, mom, and I had all stayed up. We began having real conversations, which eventually lead to them confronting me that its time to shape up. Which aggravated me because I feel like I have been making strides to, and I am doing better. But its a little too late in their minds I guess. Then we (I) rehashed old issues that we hadn’t discussed ever, and things a little heated. This wasn’t all bad mind you, I’m glad we can rationally speak about serious topics and confront each other. And still be fine the next day. The fact is they want better for me. They need me to do a lot better. They have given me grace periods, and they wont kick me out, but they want to stop putting up with bull shit. That is slightly disheartening since I felt like I was doing pretty good recently.

Slaughterhouse has been going great, full audiences, good responses. It feels worth it. but I’m going to do something tonight I’m a bit unsure about, I’m going to audition for Blithe Spirit here at ARC. Why? It’s Noel Coward, its right up my alley, I have never done a lead, and this is a great show for me. Why not? Because I want to leave! because this conflicts with ACTF, and what if slaughterhouse goes to competition.

I fantasize about leaving everyday. Bryce has an extra room in LA and offered it to me, Michael Sunshine has an extra room in Seattle. I really really want to leave, but I’m so scared. I have no money and honestly don’t even do my own laundry. (yes, I am ashamed about that).

So here’s what I’m going to do tonight. I’m going to audition and only accept the lead. If I get it (history proves I wont, so this is pretty pointless…) , I will do it.

I hate when I blog like this. I really do. It’s bitch bitch bitch, I have been complaining about the same things for years and am doing nothing about it.

I have been writing a lot. On my typewriter. Just stories, my stories. I guess its a half assed attempt at a memoir. It’s probably terrible. I realized one of my talents is for story telling, and I’m hoping it translates to paper. Mostly it is just therapeutic though. I really doubt anyone would read it. But maybe, it’s far more honest than I am on here. I am honest on here, but that has several more secrets. Things that the public consumption of a blog wouldn’t be good for. I secretly pretend I’m writing the next great American novel, I will get crazy rich from my publisher, and Oprah will tell everyone to buy it. Then it will be turned into a movie where I would be undoubtedly played by Lou Taylor Pucci. Yup, that’s how interesting I am. (that last bit was sarcastic if you couldn’t tell).

I guess I want to do this play to show my family and friends that I can. I honestly believe they think I have failed, and they want me to man up and get a real jobby job and stop wasting time being bit parts continually holding out for the next one.

I watched a documentary on SNL in 90s and in the 00s. Going the comedy route might be my best option. As ridiculous of a pipe dream that sounds like, its far more realistic than my hopes in becoming a serious actor? or a performance artist? or a celebrated author lol. I need to take a moment to realize what I do best, and it is comedy(debatable). I would be fulfilled if that were what I did for money. This is a stupid ass blog rant today….

I AM doing good. I’m in a good play and (still expecting to be…) getting paid by the winery. learning a lot about graphic design, a lot about theatre, and fuck my play might go to ACTF. And I have pretty much been only drinking on the weekends, big improvement. Surprise surprise I have been reading a fuck ton too, social commentaries, memoirs of drug addicts and drag queens, and books on acting. Who am I? I totally don’t read books. Good for me.

oh and that picture is of me and Corey Frou playing Wizard Sticks, an amazing drinking game where you stack beers and duck tape them into a staff and pretend to be wizards. When you have 11 you get a wizard hat

peace

Court did not go my way, and I owe a lot of money…. A LOT OF MONEY. Full story about this whole ordeal soon. Its really quite funny an educational cautionary tale.

But… moving on, good news! Got cast in slaughterhouse 5! Feel good now that I held out for this show. Great right? well…

Here’s the thing, (and yeah I’m gonna bitch for a minute, so if you’re not interested yall can leave devinritchie.com. Directly). I studied for this play so hard. I read the play like 4 times, broke it down, read into characters, I even read the fuckin novel for this show. And I don’t read books. I need to prepare like this for every audition because I apparently don’t have the natural panache others have to just walk in to any audition and get cast on mere talent. But I got cast so what am I bitching about? Well, I’m playing a smaller role than I had hoped for. That’s fine. I really don’t mind doing ensemble roles, especially in a show like this. If you are familiar with Slaughterhouse, I am playing the British soldier named Reggie. The guy who puts on a production of Cinderella for the other soldiers, and stars as Cinderella. …That’s right. Somehow in a play about time travel, war, and the DRESDEN BOMBING I got cast as the ONE man who wears a dress. Yes ladies and gentlemen, the only fag in the play is in drag. I’m a fucking walking talking gay joke. I’m nearly offended. I’m just tired of this gay joke thing. It will be funny and I will do it well. But, ugh. This sort of thing has been happening to me a lot. Its not acting, its a fucking perpetuation of a stereotype. Most my friends got the roles they wanted, bad ass army guys who fight, or characters with real

depth. I’m the fag in the dress. Moreover, the person who got a role I wanted and literally cues my entrance, and has a more pivotal part than I, is the same person who missed his god damn entrance in Philadelphia Story (my last play), leaving me to have to improvise and cover for him. I was a fish out of god damn water in front of an audience. Twice. Yes TWICE. we only performed it seven times. Why we rehearse for 2 months to not even bother going on stage is beyond me. But I guess that’s how to prove yourself as a dedicated actor. So I feel a bit slapped in the face being a gay joke, and being cast under someone who has done this to me on stage. That is my rant. And now its over.

Let’s put 2 and 2 together… I am no longer excited about this play due to casting and the fact that there is 20 people in it. AND I need money BAD. Do I drop the play? For my own sake and sanity and so I can be an adult paying off my fines. Or should I go gay it up and play dress up?

New Subject.

I’m headed to the bay in the morning. Kyle is having me take a train out there and were going to the Scottish Games in Pleasanton tomorrow, and the wine festival in Livermore on Sunday. Good. I need some space and clarity. And thank god Ruth is home tonight, I’m going out for the first time in a while. I have been taking it easy recently. But now its time to go celebrate my Scottish roots and wine taste. Watch pipers and get food from Clan McKintosh. Cant wait.

I dunno what to do I’m all lost and confused yall.

peace.

I’m headed to the Bay Area this weekend to go stay with my brother. Were going to go to the Scottish games in Pleasanton and the Wine Harvest festival in Livermore. Oh and I might be pouring for Lavious Laines winery at Concannon

This is really all I had to say. Really just wanted to show off my sexy new hair ;D

peace

Me & Ruthie at Club 21

Sorry for the delay, I AM still working on the HUGE 2009 recap post. And believe me, it is huge. But meanwhile that shouldnt stop me from blogging like usual.

I have been doing super good recently. I am back in school. I am in a relationship now (more on that later…). I have been seeing a lot of my friends recently. I am drinking again, but I am generally responsible with it, so that’s good. Adie is trying to get me a job at Jamba Juice, I am not proud of this, I kinda hate t hate that I’m doing it. But it has reached the point of ridiculousness and I need $. The icing on the cake is I just auditioned for Philaldelphia Story at ARC, and I feel really good about it. I am at the point where I’m not nervous, and I know I audition well, and past that there is nothing else I can do. It’s oddly comforting. We shall see if I get a call back.

Also, my Grandma kinda lives here in Sacramento with me and my mom now. Long story. But it’s not so bad. Sorta changes my lifestyle though.

Thought I would just give you guys a heads up about everything.

Peace.